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I want to say I am not a bad person, just prone to anxiety and bouts inertia and depression. Although depression hasn't been so much of an issue lately. In fact, I've been disturbingly cheerful for the last three or four months, since I've gone off the medication that I was taking for anxiety and depression. I'm concerned that I'm too happy, and that maybe medication I've taken has permanently destroyed my brain.
However, even bad people are prone to anxiety, and bouts of inertia, and depression. And there is a chance I am bad as well.
I've been trying to work on art this summer, despite issues with not taking medication (regardless of how chipper my mood has been) and issues with family. Much of my family does not like me very much.
But I have tried to work on art. I wanted to post more, but I only have maybe a dozen finished things to scan and post.
I am looking forward to the start of the new Fall semester next week, even though I will only be taking one art class (ceramics). I wanted to take more painting classes, but I have no way to take canvases back and forth to school. So I will have to work up the motivation to paint at home if I ever hope to improve.
However, even bad people are prone to anxiety, and bouts of inertia, and depression. And there is a chance I am bad as well.
I've been trying to work on art this summer, despite issues with not taking medication (regardless of how chipper my mood has been) and issues with family. Much of my family does not like me very much.
But I have tried to work on art. I wanted to post more, but I only have maybe a dozen finished things to scan and post.
I am looking forward to the start of the new Fall semester next week, even though I will only be taking one art class (ceramics). I wanted to take more painting classes, but I have no way to take canvases back and forth to school. So I will have to work up the motivation to paint at home if I ever hope to improve.
Worms
1. I made myself work on art last weekend, and am pleased to have a picture to post today! I've been busy lately, getting things done that I don't want to do, but that's been mostly unpleasant things not related to art. Having a picture to post is far more satisfying than getting medical insurance crap straightened out.
2. There is a spot on my face, and I am convinced it is cancer. Or waiting to become cancer. Or a generally evil freckle, waiting for an excuse to do something that will result in my whole face having to be removed. It is very inspiring, and I want to draw it.
3. I am taking my science classes finally, and the things I am le
Happy New Year, Peoples.
It's been almost a year since I was on here. It was kind of a crappy year, last year. I hurt my back and it got pretty bad toward the summer, couldn't sleep for more than an hour or two at a stretch because of the pain. That sucked, and even after physical therapy that got rid of the pain I was/ am slightly traumatized from the experience. I had been considering suicide despite not being depressed, and I feel mentally scarred from where my mind was. I feel like I was set back in nearly every aspect of my life.
I think I prefer the feeling of being suicidal when I am depressed, rather than the feeling of wishing to end my life due to poor qu
Heads
In ceramics this semester, we've only had two classes so far, but I've been able to make so many heads. That is my continuing goal; to learn how to properly sculpt human heads. Somehow, I improved a great deal since last semester; although I did not sculpt on the break, I did a lot of drawing and attempting to learn proportions. I also have been reading several books that discuss techniques by other ceramic artists. "The Figure in Clay: Contemporary Sculpting Techniques by Master Artists" has been VERY helpful.
I have six heads so far, varying from life-size to about 7" high, all in various stages of completion. And then our first project w
Art.
For the first time in a long time, I won't be attending school full time while I work full time; financial issues mean I can only take a class or two at a time until I get my probably useless associate's degree. I haven't been able to work on my own art projects in so long, I'm excited and delighted and terrified that I will finally have the time to.
I just went through and finished up some older drawings that I am posting tonight. My scanner is still not that great. Oh well.
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Mental illness is hard... much love to you. xx